Ad #9

26 year-old femme with sparks of dykeyness seeks hotness on the butch side.   I like using my hands when I talk, eating good cheese, helping people move, and wearing summer dresses.  I’m looking for someone with a big heart (maybe you also like to help people move?) who likes feminism.  Brighton Beach lovers get extra points.

Ad #8: Fag 4 Fag

Pretty boy seeks fags for spring flings and hot times. You are: forward, switchy-to-toppy, and playful. I am: forward, switchy-to-bottomy, Patsy to your Edina. I’ll make you breakfast if you buy me dinner.

Ad #7: Bubbe(ish) seeks sometimes Zaydie

26 y.o. bubbe seeks sweetheart with some zaydie appeal. homebody looking for someone to get her out of the house more, but not that much more. some things that i especially like include graphic novels, baking, dogs, fermenting things, high thread counts, popcorn

Ad #6

29yo crafty femme writer/drummer/aspiring massage therapist seeks smart pretty girls for bike rides, city adventures, kisses and maybe more. I’m colorful and charming and love long conversations, crayons, gin & tonics, brass bands, new discoveries and all things queer. Bonus points for other makers of things (artists, builders, crafters) and/or activist folk. But no poly stuff for me, thanks — I’m a one-woman girl.

Ad #5

27yo chubby queer femme seeks makeout partner(s). Prefer faggy style and attitude, queer masculinities, kinky folks and fatties. Hair pulling a plus. Good brain and decent politics preferred–nothing makes for a hotter makeout than some really good conversation first.

Ad #4: dyke seeks fag for hot queer times – ftwtf4mtwtf

I’m a perverted genderqueer that looks like a dyke, fucks like a fag/dirty old man/occasionally femme porn star, and I’m super hot for flamboyantly queer men. I love camp sensibilities and communication skills between the sheets and in the streets. I’m smart, sassy, a jewish anarchist, and a damn good time. I make crush art. Charm my pants off, boys!
+ if you are obsessed with things, appreciative of chubsters, feminist, a reader, a good story teller, sparkly-eyed, in the struggle, not a major drinker/drugger.

Ad #3

looking for a smartypants artist or an arty academic who loves women and loves being a woman.  i am a city mouse and a country mouse looking for the same.  someone who thinks the thought of someday bringing kiddos along to international film festivals & shoots actually sounds fun.  fancy parties make me happy and messy gardens do, too. i believe in moderation. in passion. in justice. i like people who manifest their dreams, who see the glass at least half full, who are patient but not passive. i’d like to go to lebanon in poppy season, holland when the tulips are blooming. not a fan of bars unless they are filled with friends. prefer outdoors to in, quiet to loud, homecooked vs. takeout. i love adventures, i love running water, i love animals in nature but unfortunately i just don’t like cats. the getting to know you thing is fun for me, the rushing into things thing isn’t.

picky, yes, but these things are best on the table from the start…  i like tall.  won’t date a zionist. and you gotta be at least 30, or close, very close.

Ad #2: 28yo queer butchy/faggy type person seeks dates.

Over-educated theory geek, self-taught culinary prodigy, art enthusiast and activist policy wonk. Natural habitat: Brooklyn coffee shops. Can be found engaged in revelatory conversations with baristas, small children and over-caffeinated passers-by. By night, can be observed at Dolly Parton concerts, playing license plate scrabble on the Taconic Parkway, or hosting blowout rooftop dance parties.

OK, so enough with the Discovery Channel — I’m better discovered in person anyway.

Oh, bubbelehs, before bed…

This is just the best ad I’ve ever seen: don’t you want her to carry home your groceries? All you Park Slope Co-op members, you should make sure you tell your friends!

“you say make-up shift, i say make-out shift….”

late 20’s femme queer with upper body strength will carry your groceries home from the co-op if you invite me up afterwards. you: hot smart queer (any of a range of genders a-ok), responsive to a seemingly anonymous pickup, happy to be pushed against a wall but able to push me back. me: as described, with a penchant for kale, chocolate, and overly expensive beer; happy to suffer the indignities of the mandated orange vest if you take it off me later.

if you’d prefer to carry my groceries home, i could also pick you out of the lineup of available cart-pushers, take you past the official walking-a-person-home zone, and have my way with you.

Well hello there, meine kinder!

Feygeles, maideles:

Queer Yenta is pleased to be here for you!

Yes, again, and formally, Queer Yenta is opening her doors for business!

Soon, soon this blog will have:
* ads for you to peruse;

* dating tips for you to use;

* adorable guest bloggers for you to shmooze;

* success stories over which you can effuse!

Yes, yes, all of this — and more! But first, meine kinder, the questions you all want to know:

Who is Queer Yenta, you ask?

Queer Yenta is a very nice team of queers about town who want to serve their community. Rather, Queer Yenta is a very nice old lady about town who was already setting up all her friends and decided to make a shtick of it. Rather, Queer Yenta is a very nice old lady about town who wants to matchmake you!

What will Queer Yenta help me with?

Queer Yenta wants you — yes, you! — to find whatever you are looking for. A gay to marry? A homo for humping? A pal for pushing around? Yes!

Queer Yenta does not meddle in the affairs of others but encourages you to be open and honest with everyone whose heart is vulnerable to you. Do not be a shmuck!

How does it work?

Well, bubbelehes, you have to take a risk. There is a funny phenomenon Queer Yenta has noticed — “Oh, I don’t want to put an ad up — I just want to look and see what happens.” While window shopping is very nice at Century 21 and other fine shopping establishments, if you wanted to sit on your hands and not put yourself out there, I hear there are many bars the young folk are going to these days where you can do just that — and listen to music!

So you send Queer Yenta an ad. She features you. Or perhaps you comment here on this very blog and someone catches your eye. Or perhaps you see an ad you like, and you respond –and Queer Yenta will help you!

Queer Yenta will also do what she can to help make sure you do not make a mess out of yourself, but oy! No one can keep it all straight.

More, meine kinder, but oh, Queer Yenta is up late for an old lady!